Today I felt okay until about 5 pm and then the restlessness and annoying feelings of the akathesia came back.  

I took some benadryl, then a klonopin and laid down to try and nap.  That didn’t work out so well – Sarah wasn’t having it and wanted my attention.  She woke me up screaming and screaming, she just did not want her Grammy holding her.  Just as I got her squared away, the stupid weather radio went off and I about passed out when I saw the huge “TORNADO WARNING” flash across the screen.  Dave had just gotten home so we all piled in the basement until the warning expired.  I thought Henry was going to faint, his lips had turned white and all the blood had drained from his face, poor thing.

I don’t know what to do about my meds.  I want to ask him if I can take Topamax again, the name brand this time, because I just don’t think the generic worked as well as the original.  I can’t spend the rest of my life taking klonopin (well I could…) and I hate all the anti-psychotics on the market.  It’s like being shot with horse tranquilizer.  It makes my nose stuffed up, screws up my blood sugar and everything just seems weird.  

I cannot get this meatball out of my chest.  It’s going to kill me, that will be the end of me: a meatball.